KOER Synthetica Radio Transcripts

[KOER Synthetica Radio Transcripts]

It took me a while of meandering through the back stacks, but I finally found the track I was looking for. From the Cure, A Forest.

[KOER Synthetica Radio Transcripts]

Hope you enjoyed that touch of Ronnie Reno singing that "my baby just wrote me a letter" song. Now we at KOER are not proud at all to present Gloria Allred, officially certified media hog, who wants to -

What?

Excuse me. Management (that's me, by the way) has requested that I make the following statement: the use of the word "hog" in the statement above was not meant in any way to be disparaging to obese people or Muslims.

CUTE, O.

Welcome, Gloria. So you've had a busy few days.

YES, O. YOU RIDICULE MY MEDIA APPEARANCES, BUT THESE APPEARANCES ARE NECESSARY TO PROTECT THOSE PEOPLE WHO HAVE BEEN CRUELLY VICTIMIZED. IN FACT -

C'mon, Gloria! Cruelly victimized? The so-called "victims" of Michael Richards' bad comedy routine were not forced to remain in the room, despite your bizarre claims.

BUT THEY WERE, O. AND, IN FACT, THE LAUGH FACTORY IS DEMONSTRATING AN INSTITUTIONALIZED REIGN OF TERROR, WHICH IS WHY THE LAUGH FACTORY ITSELF IS NAMED IN MY LATEST LITIGATION ON BEHALF OF NUMEROUS VICTIMS.

Victims? Which victims are these?

WELL, SINCE YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON, O, I BROUGHT MY OWN AUDIO:

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Give yourselves a big round of applause for coming down and supporting Nigger Night.

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I'll be damned if the white man uses that word last. This is part of our culture now... don't take that from us.

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Who was that, Gloria?

DAMON WAYANS. BUT WE'RE GOING FOR THE DEEP POCKETS HERE. IN FACT, WE ARE REQUESTING THAT THE LAUGH FACTORY BAN ALL COMEDY FROM ITS FACILITY. THAT'S THE ONLY WAY THAT WE CAN ENSURE THAT NO ONE ELSE WILL BE SUBJECTED TO SUCH HORROR.

They have comedy at the Laugh Factory?